Friday Fictioneers -A Tale Endless as Summer

~ neilmacdon
clouds-above-the-trees
PHOTO PROMPT © Rochelle Wisoff-Fields

“I’ve built us a story to live in,” he said.

“But I don’t like you much,” she replied.

The little man looked smug as If expecting this. “No matter – you will in the story.”

“In any case,” she said, “it’s impossible – I promised Albert to be in his play.”

“Pah! Bert! The boy’s plots are sound, but the characterisation is weak. You’ll end up thin and wasted.”

Arms folded, she glared, foot beating out a rhythm of unease.

“There’s a beach,” he wheedled, certain of wearing her down. “I’ve hired the summer. And you’ll never grow old.”

 

Friday fictioneers is a weekly challenge set by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields to write a 100-word story in response to a photo prompt. You can find other stories here.

Fancy sharpening your skill with writing exercises? The Scrivener’s Forge offers a new exercise every month to hone one aspect of your craft. Take a look at this month’s exercise here

106 thoughts on “Friday Fictioneers -A Tale Endless as Summer”

  2. I don’t like this Neil…..I love it….made me smile this morning especially as I’m off to Spain tomorrow…can you build me a story please? Xxxxx

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  19. This was absolutely wonderful, Neil! I loved the exchange between the two and could have sat through pages and pages of it! But, we’re only allowed 100 words… sigh…

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  21. I wouldn’t mind a man building a story for me – but it would have to be the right man and the right story. I wonder if either of these are right for her? Lively, refreshing take on the prompt, Neil. Lovely work

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  26. I really loved this, Neil. Excellent with a dream-like quality, which I guess has been described as creepy by some of the others. I was intrigued by your reference to “the little man” and who it refers to. The muse? It made me think of a leprechaun. It’s also a term of endearment we use for young sons in Australia: “our little man”.
    xx Rowena

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  29. I built a story for C.E. and Dale to live in, but neither seem too comfortable there. He would have rather enjoyed murder mystery and she was longing for a romance. Some characters you just can’t please in 100 words.

    Maybe your character doesn’t understand that when we “stop growing old” we’re dead. I loved the concept of this piece. Excellent work, Neil.

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  30. This is GOOD, Neil. Leans toward the poetic, yet has the literary qualities. Sensational work this week!

    Five out of five sunshine and sunny beaches!

    Like

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  33. Persistent man. I am sure I sense a sinister note in his statement of never growing old! But that’s just my suspicions wreaking havoc. He must be nice, for all I know.
    Well written!

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  35. Brilliant. There is so much to love about this piece, from well chosen words, to the writing, to the characters, to what is left unsaid. Some how I find this a very romantic piece although it could be read as a dark piece.

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  44. I love the idea of building a story to live in, it’s very positive and involves taking control of your destiny. Of course you need the willingness of others to be involved in the story but if the story is right, they’ll come. I didn’t see him as creepy but as someone wanting to go the extra mile and create something beautiful, even if that may be delusional. I could go on because I think the idea has so much within it, it forces thoughts and ideas out of the reader. The possibilities are there that a group of people could sit round with a drink discussing late into the night.

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  46. It’s all a lie… cough… a tale of fiction revealing truths hidden. Is there a long piece using these characters? A short story maybe. I think this is the kind of thing Kerry likes in her Short Story Competition.

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