
They cut the head off to make her fit. My fridge is small.
For six days, grief ravaged me. On the seventh, I grabbed my Desert Tech MDR and fitted the clip. In my head, music played. I knew this story. I was this story.
There would be blood. There would be vengeance for my wounded masculinity. There would be congratulations.
But reality’s not like that. The black dude dies first. Do it by the book: the book of law, not the fictional one.
I wish I’d known Mary better before they killed her.
Friday fictioneers is a weekly challenge set by Rochelle Wisoff Fields to write a 100-word story in response to a photo prompt. You can find other stories here
Cryptic!
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Sorry about that
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I enjoyed it 🙂
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Oh well, that’s all right then
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Vivid word portrait of somebody connecting to reality for the first time. What a tragedy that Mary had to die so that your protagonist could see. There’s a sense of past, present and future in your story.
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What a sympathetic reading, Jilly. Thanks so much
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Wounded masculinity when someone kills a woman you love. That’s an interesting concept. A whole range of emotions here.
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It’s always wounded masculinity. Almost always
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Dear Neil,
Cringeworthy from beginning to end.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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I hope that’s a good thing
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It is.
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In that case, thanks so much, Rochelle
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I’m not sure I can figure out what happened here. mysterious tale.
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His lover has been killed. He contemplates revenge. He thinks better of it
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OKay, so his comptemplation is in the music I see,
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Not sure 6 days grief would be enough for me if I was Mary. Stop waving your masculinity around and have a proper cry, man!
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The truth is, he wasn’t that into Mary
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I knew it!
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I was so disturbed that I had to click like. Very dark.
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It’s not always a bad thing to be disturbed by a story
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A lot suggested here. Intriguing.
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And a lot (but not all) of it, not good
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Great title and opening.
I’m imagining the Valkyrie song (forgot the name) being the music in his head. There is so much I want to know about this scenario! I hope he gets what he’s looking for.
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Yes, Ride of the Valyrie would be perfect for the scene
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Wounded masculinity held in check. The price would have been too high to go with his first urge.
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He’s seen enough movies to know
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It would appear 😉
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Hm, I had to read that half a dozen times before I really understood it. He left it rather too late to get to know his wife/lover/partner.
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I’m not sure it occurred to him at the time that getting to know her was important
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The impulse for revenge can be a hard one to overcome.
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At least he thought twice about it
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it looks like he’s thinking of revenge but i wonder if he’s up to it. it doesn’t sound like it.
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No. Wiser counsels have prevailed
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Wounded masculinity? Try toxic. This is what the feminist and big corps are warning up about. Dark tale — I like it.
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Thanks so much, Tannille
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Class first line, really set the story up.
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Thanks so much. I was pleased with it, and the title
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They put her in his fridge? His? No wonder he’s contemplating vengeance.
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I think they were making a statement
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Not sure what I’m reading but its incredibly atmospheric and puts me in a confused state. Which is a food thing I think!
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A food thing?
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Sorry a good thing!
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Ah, I thought perhaps it was that
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I really dislike this guy. It’s all about him, his masculinity, his revenge, his reality…and the gun. I wonder what he did so ‘they’ found it necessary to kill Mary and stuff her into his fridge.
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They didn’t like him much either
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“I” wouldn’t kill Mary though. 😉 (I think…)
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You say that, but you don’t know Mary
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😀
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There’s a HUGE clue in the very first sentence. “They cut THE head off.” It could have been a deer, or a big turkey, or some other food animal. The, we get smacked with the headless thing being a woman! Good grief.
Your writing continues to intrigue, Neil.
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Thanks so much, Linda.
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I saw him turning the gun on himself,, as he seems a wimp
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Could be. Thanks, Michael
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Intriguing tale, Neil!
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Thanks so much, Brenda
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All righty then … Can you please give an address so we know where NOT to go? 😉
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It’s safe to go. Just don’t look in the fridge
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I donnow … what if he expands to closets? 😉
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Then running might be a good idea
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(putting on my running shoes, just in case)
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Oh dear, poor Mary
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It’s OK. He didn’t really know much about her
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Intriguing story, loved the opening line. I get a dystopian western vibe with vengeance seeking cowboys.
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Thanks so much. Yes, the vengeance-seeking cowboy is one of the most potent tropes of adventure thrillers in Western societies. Other cultures will substiute other tropes, of course
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He seems completely cut off from his emotions… or maybe just numb?
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That’s a generous interpretation
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