
Mrs. Gant always scared me. She’d race out of the temple at us kids, waving her mop like a scimitar. The fear meant I never did get to find out who they worshipped in there. I imagined stern priests, stone slabs, and human sacrifice.
It seems fanciful now, slinking past the bland block structure. Four decades since I walked the neighbourhood. Mrs. Gant long gone.
And yet. The iron railings carry wrought shapes. And those swirling shapes pull in shadows from the temple garden, plucking with lean fingers at the shades from the street. I turn and run like hell.
Friday fictioneers is a weekly challenge set by Rochelle Wisoff Fields to write a 100-word story in response to a photo prompt. You can find other stories here
i liked this, a great piece of writing, concise and clear.
You are right to run away, look at the horrors that occur in the name of religion.
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Thanks so much, James. I’ve never been clear on the exact calculus of the horror committed in the name of religions and the good committed in their name,
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More crimes are committed in the name of religion than any other. Likes this a lot, Neil
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Thanks, Neel. I’m not sure there was any crime here. Just a child’s fear
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Smooth writing. I enjoyed how the street triggered a childhood memory.
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Thanks, Tannille. I’m experimenting at the moment with how small sensations, memories and interactions below the level of consciousness give rise to larger actions and thoughts
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Keep it up! Dive into psychology.
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A strange piece for you, Neil, written with your usual aplomb.
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Thanks so much. What did you find strange about it?
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Oh drat, sorry.
The last six words.
To me, and probably only to me, they seem somehow odd, not fitting as seamlessly as your writing usually does.
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Interesting, thanks.
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You capture the memories left from childhood well. I haven’t set foot in a church to worship since I was forced to go by my parents until I was about 12, but still, there is something about those buildings…
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Thanks so much, Iain
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Dear Neil,
What a pity one person terrorized the child even into his adult years. Perhaps if he’d gone inside he would’ve learned a different story. Well penned, sir.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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There’s always the road less travelled. Thanks so much, Rochelle
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If it wasn’t for Mrs Gant things would probably have been very different.
Keith’s Ramblings is a click away!
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Of such small accidents lives are made
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A nightmare is a nightmare, whatever its vintage. Beautifully described.
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Thanks so much, Sandra
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Vivid story. I like it very much. Mrs Gant (ancient, at least thirty) was stressed from working for her demanding priests and couldn’t risk a little lad contaminating the freshly-washed slabs. I heard she won the pools and told the priests where to stick the mop.
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Thanks so much, Jilly. And thanks for your story. You should come back to FF
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I agree with Sandra… Well written, as I expect of you 😉
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Thanks so much, Dale
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Early impressions that a child never forgets can certainly be life-changing. Sad that this one had such a negative effect. Good writing–I could almost feel the fear.
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Thanks so much, Linda
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Rich imagery and stream of consciousness here.
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Thank you, Jade
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I like your descriptions here. I noticed the fence too, but couldn’t think of a good way to use it. Nicely done.
-David
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Thanks so much, David. Glad someone else noticed the fence
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I enjoy the way you create such vivid scenes. Those childhood impressions are nearly impossible to change.
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Thanks so much, Brenda
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Well done. You really capture that childish sense of mystery and the fact that those impressions often stay with us all our lives.
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Thanks so much, Joshua
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I think a child sometimes imagines the worst.. reminds me of Boo Radley in “How to kill a Mockingbird”
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Thanks, Bjorn
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This is great, I love this experiment. The writing throws me back into my own childhood, the fears, the curiosity, the strange interpretations only children can ind for things they don’t understand. The description of the shadows is magical–and confirmation of strange things going on. 🙂
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Thanks so much. Strange was the atmosphere I was going for
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Those childhood fears can be firmly imprinted on the mind.
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Indeed they can
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Mrs Gant had created such a deep impression, many many years later kids now grown into adults are still scared.
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Exactly right
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I, too, liked the way you described the fence, especially the “plucking with lean fingers” part. Full of mood and the almost embarrassed underlying acknowledgement of his persistent fear’s illogic.
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Thanks so much, Andy
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Childhood fears are tough to eradicate. I couldn’t help feeling envious that after all that time he could still ‘run like hell’ 🙂
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He’s kept in shape
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Good writing, Neil. The poor child is so scared of an older woman and wondering about what was in the synagogue. It’s odd some of the things a young mind creates when the child either sees little of a person, just hears stories, or doesn’t see inside a place. I’d been in most of the homes near mine as there were children but not in the one with none. I often wondered about those mystery people. —- Suzanne
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An interesting wonder. Thanks, Suzanne
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Great story! It’s amazing how many ideas and superstitions from childhood still linger on well into our adult years!
-Rachel
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And how many from our cultural infancy too
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Ooooo love the last paragraph. Creepy shadows are always scary to me
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Thanks so much, Laurie
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Some fears seem to be ingrained. Loved the writing!
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Thanks so much, Sascha
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My piece is something similar to yours, with a difference.
Good picture of childhood infringing into adulthood!😊
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Thanks so much
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I wonder what the poor child did to incur the wrath of Mrs. Gant. Nicely done.
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For some, being alive is enough to provoke wrath
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Got a kick out of ‘being chased my the mop by the old lady’. I can understand the scars! Hahaha. Enjoyed!
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Thanks so much
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I can see this character in my mind. Is Mrs. Gant’s bark worse than her bite? Either way I have heard about this character living in a small town growing up and you wrote the piece wonderfully & very true to how it is. A great write indeed.
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Thank you so much, Lisa. I think Mrs Gant is probably harmless
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They usually are. Lovely write.
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We never forget those shadows from our childhood.
Mine were in the closet!
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No, we don’t
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Lovely imagery in the last paragraph. No escaping some childhood demons for him.
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Thanks so much
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Wonderfully atmospheric and moody. Fantastic details – so suggestive and menacing.
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Thanks so much, Margaret
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