This just couldn’t be right. It offended against everything I’d ever heard.
“You’re kidding, surely?”
“Why?” Ka’arsnak waved a tentacle. I’d learned this signalled irritation. “What’s wrong?”
“The portal opens into a shower?”
The tentacle waved more vigorously. “You wanted maybe a waterfall? Rainbows? Heavenly choirs?”
“Well, it’s not, you know, dignified. Not believable.”
The choking gargle was its way of expressing sarcastic mirth. “An angel with green skin and eight tentacles you can accept, but not a doorway through a bathroom? Get over it, you’re dead. Time to go. Chop-chop.”
Friday fictioneers is a weekly challenge set by Rochelle Wisoff Fields to write a 100-word story in response to a photo prompt. You can find other stories here.
Fancy sharpening your skill with writing exercises? The Scrivener’s Forge offers a new exercise every month to hone one aspect of your craft. Take a look at this month’s exercise on plot and endings
Neil MacDonald Author 
It does indeed have the look of a portal. Great imagination Neil, I can imagine if there is anything after life it will be as mundane as a shower room. Good fun.
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Thanks, Iain
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Ka’arsnak doesn’t sound very angelic either. Full marks for demystifying angels. I am beginning to wonder now if my surly neighbour is one?
Loved your very imaginative take. Great idea having a portal in a shower. Hide it in plain sight 🙂
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Thanks so much
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Dear Neil,
That’s not the angelic being I would expect to show up to lead the way. Perhaps there’s another portal through the drain. 😉 Clever story.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Thanks, Rochelle
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Very cleverly crafted, NEIL.
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thanks, Neel
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I’ll never see my shower in the same light. Creative take!
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I understand some of the portals are in stationery cupboards too
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And gloveboxes. Don’t you hate it when you find tentacles sticking out of your glove compartment?
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This was a fun take on the prompt, Neil. Seems like Ka’arsnak and chop-chop are going to have a grand time in earth.
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Thanks, Varad
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Made me smile, Neil. And yes, I’m sure if angels were a reality they would be completely different from the image many people have. I imagine them short tempered – with swords. Nicely done
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A portal in the bathroom would be a mixed blessing, I think.
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I agree. troubling if the dead start returning while you’re in the bath
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This made me laugh. I love the Chop-chop line! Very clever, Neil.
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Thanks, Alicia
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When I saw the title, I yawned. When I read the story, I grinned like a loon! Good one, Neil!
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Thanks Penny, sorry about the title, but it is integral to the effect of the story, yawn and all
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True!
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And a portal! Nice one 🙂
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Thanks, Jane
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Loved it, brought a good chuckle this afternoon! 🙂 ❤
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What more can a writer ask?
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A portal into cleanliness.
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Well, maybe. It is next to godliness
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Made me giggle — loved the angel’s attitude!
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Thanks, Joy
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I’d have struck out right off by not accepting an angel with green skin and tentacles. I’d far rather have Reepicheep, but something tells me this portal won’t get you to Narnia. Atlantis maybe? Well written, Neil. Nice knowing you. 🙂
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Thanks so much, Christine
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I had to idea where you were going until the last line, and then I laughed out loud. Chop chop, indeed 🙂
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I’m glad it made you laugh
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Time to move, oh dead one… dignity be damned!
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That’s what ghosts are – folks who don’t realise they’re dead
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Indeed!
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There was something a bit spooky or maccabre about the light in that bathroom and your take blended in well with that. Your creature could be the reason young children are often afraid of toilets.
I lost track of last night and only posted mine this afternoon. https://beyondtheflow.wordpress.com/2017/08/17/minding-the-dog-friday-fictioneers/
xx Rowena
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Thanks, Rowena
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That was a good story. Angelic demons are fine. But Portals should be jazzed up. The bathroom is a let down, i guess.
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Maybe it’s bathos
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The last paragraph made me chuckle. This is my kind of story, Neil.
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Thanks Russell. From the master of comedy that’s high praise
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Enjoyed that, Neil. “Not dignified. Not believable.” Ha! Well done.
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Thanks, David
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Time travel as shower spaghetti, I like it🙂
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Thanks, Michael
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I think I would have more issues with that angel really… wonder if you have reached heaven or hell.
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It’s not altogether clear that they’re different places
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haha! I agree wholeheartedly, Neil. What kind of logic is it when they can accept the unexplainable but not the eccentric? Fun story!
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Thanks, William
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Great fun on many levels. Love the imaginative take on what an angel is and the indignity of the portal being in a bathroom.
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Thanks Cindy
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Hehehe
I actually liked this a lot. Thanks for the morning chuckle.
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If you laughed my work here is done
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An un-humbe dead person, lacking in faith, hmmm, I wonder which portal he got. No laugh here, sorry, Neil.
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One man’s meat is another’s poisson. No problem
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Ha – now that made me smile – because some men might be vegetarian!
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Portal! A super take on the prompt and it is funny too to think of the shower as the portal 😀
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Thanks, Dahlia
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Great story, Neil!
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Thanks, Liz
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This gave me a chuckle. 🙂
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I can’t ask for more
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Creative angel. Fun story.
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Thanks
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